11. Gone

-   Leah, Clearwater

I was partial to the Cullen’s, my nose wrinkling as I endured their sweet sickly scent. But I could live with it. I hoped. Since Seth, and myself, had broken away from Sam’s pack, my misery around him no longer an issue, we were mostly around the Cullen house as Jacob couldn’t part with his little imprint, Renesmee Carlie Cullen.

“Don’t you think it’s cute,” Seth teased as we ran patrol.

I snarled, baring my teeth, “Stop talking and run!”

“Jeez sorry, Leah, I didn’t think you were so touchy today,” he lamented mockingly.

“Sorry Seth, I just don’t like talking about it. It’s normal for guys to turn into wolves and imprint,” I barked a laugh. “But female shifters aren’t as common. Would it work the same for me?” I sighed, panting as I felt my paws dig into ground, the wind curling through my fur.

He paced behind me, his head bowed. “You can’t think like that, it’s too negative,” he answered.

“Aren’t I always negative, Seth? Come on, Jacob will kill us if we don’t finish running patrol,” I jerked my head forward in a persuasive motion. He caught up faster than I expected, smirking a grin we raced till the end.

Padding up the driveway, two cars pulled in the garage. Alice’s yellow Porsche, and Rosalie’s BMW M3 Convertible, Alice slid out of hers first carrying multiple shopping bags, she had obviously escaped to Port Angles for some shopping before a disaster struck – which they usually did around the family.

I had became closer to Rosalie than any of the other Cullen’s, she understood me alot more. Emmett bounded up to front porch and disappeared inside as soon as he leaped over the side door, and pecked Rosalie on the cheek.

“I’m going to go say ‘hi’ to Edward and the others, you coming?”

Seth had already changed and was busy pulling his t-shirt over his head, the black tuft of hair messy and displaced. “No, I think I’ll stay here and talk to Rose.”

“Fair enough,” he cheered happily and stalked off inside the house.

I heard there greetings from inside the house, Seth’s delight at Esme’s cooking and at her motherly love.

I found myself deeper into the fringe of the forest that surrounded the Cullen house, I felt the usual shiver of magic as my paws became hands and feet and my muzzle changed to a normal human face. A chill crawled across my skin as I clambered into my clothes. I could see my reflection in a trapped puddle in the ground: exotic copper skin, shoulder length black hair with thick dark eyelashes that reminded Bella of feather dusters.

I smothered my laughter, as I thought of how ridiculous that was. I never did like Bella that much, my dislike had increased of her when she caused Jacob so much heartache and was changed into a bloodsucker like the rest of them. My aversion to her was now at a minimal, but I still stayed clear of her.

Walking up to Rosalie who was hunched over her car, most probably using her mechanical ability to fix a lose bolt, “Hey Rose.”

“Hi Leah, heard you just ran patrol?”

Pulling my arms up in mock frustration, “Yeh, Jacob has us running patrols while he spends some quality time with Renesmee. He’s been so busy with Sam” – I choked out the words – “he hasn’t had a chance to take that much of a break.”

“Hmm, who’s let the dogs off their leashes,” she chuckled.

I laughed along, comically. I was used to Rosalie’s jokes and didn’t take too much offence, unlike the guys. “They want to sort out some patrol details since Paul is leaving with Jacob’s sister, Rachel, to Washington as she visits her college there for a few weeks. Jared is with Kim most of them time as well. Quil is tentative, and Claire’s only small so he doesn’t have such an attraction with her, more of brotherly love.” I noticed I was starting to ramble on and forced my mouth shut.

Oil stains peppered her once immaculate outfit; she didn’t seem to mind. We continued to chat about small things. I could relate to Rosalie and her situation, even if she was kinda dead and still walking the earth. I pushed past my disgust for vampires and concentrated on our conversation.

“Rosalie,” I asked hesitantly.

She caught my eyes, the golden colour was liquefied and they radiated warmth and understanding.

I forced my fear back, “How do you get over it? Not being able to ever have a child?”

Her strength wavered; coiling a strand of blonde hair around her finger she heaved a sigh, “I can’t. Emmett relieves some of the pain, and I am immensely grateful I found him no doubt about it, but there is a part of me that aches for a child.” She smiled doubtfully, “But since Renesmee I think I can put my motherly love into some good use, and I appreciate Bella for giving me something that I have wanted for years, even if it isn’t fully mine.”

I feel my russet skin blemish as I felt embarrassed to have asked, Rosalie interrupted my internal thoughts, “Its gets easier, Leah.”

My intention of asking hung limp in my mind, just then Sam emerged from the shadows of the trees. He never tracked this far to the Cullen house; I felt a shiver crawl against my skin. I ran over my heart hammering against my chest. The pain didn’t dull; it gained the advantage digging deeper forging roots of steel.

“What’s up?” I panted.

His brown eyes were soft and filled with sadness as he knew the pain he would be causing me, “Emily and I are taking a week away and I need Jacob to cover, can you get him?” He could see the hatred blossoming from the roots that were formed in my chest.

“Give me a second.”

Using a slow stride I paced up to the porch and called Jacob outside, I avoided the inside of the house where the smell would attack my nose. “What’s up Leah,” he asked, punching my shoulder playfully.

I pointed towards Sam, “He needs you to be Alpha for the pack while he and Emily go away for a week,” I ground my teeth as the words poured from my mouth.

Running over, I returned to Rosalie. The chatter was short and succinct; instead I over-heard the protests between Jacob and Sam, I clicked my tongue in annoyance.

“You can’t be serious?”

“I am.”

“You know the pack is short of members already, you said you wanted to keep the younger wolves like Colin and Brady from patrolling, so what are we going to do,” Jacob roared.

Sam cocked an eyebrow while he debated, “You’ll just have to double up; I won’t have the younger ones running patrols when there could be potential danger out there.”

Sighing, “To hell with it, I’ll sort something out. Where are you and Emily going anyways?”

“To the Makah reservation to visit her brother and sister,” he announced.

I growled under my breath; “You go, I’ll handle things.”

“Thanks Jacob,” he patted his arm and left in a steady run to turn into a wolf, and return to his Emily. The roots spread like an infection, excavating further into my chest and corrupting me. I silently wanted to scream out my irritation.

Jacob didn’t even bother to fill me in, but instead ran straight for the Cullen house, back to his imprint. I felt like crying, everyone was imprinting and I would be left until I could control the wolf inside me and get rid of it for good. I wrapped my arms around my chest.

Rosalie was uncertain whether to ask or not, I asked her continue. “Do you and Sam have a past, Leah,” she enquired. I felt my chest tighten.

“We used to date before he changed into a wolf, then he imprinted with Emily, my second cousin. It crushed my heart, now leaving it fractured,” I mumbled to last sentence to myself.

“Oh, I didn’t know.”

Raising the topic had my mind set on what I wanted to do before I thought it, I was going to leave. Move away and start college. Start a new life somewhere else, and feel normal instead of the ‘wolfy girl.’ The roots in my chest tangled and knotted, I decided that if I stayed here in La Push all my life, I wouldn’t be-able to move on from Sam and everything would be confusion.

Rosalie had now entered the house on my silent note, walking up to the porch I projected my thoughts to Edward, the mind reader would surely pick them up.

I’m leaving La Push, I told him telepathically. Don’t tell anyone unless they ask, I don’t know where I’m going but as long as I stay here I’m not going to be able to hold out no longer. Tell everyone goodbye for me.

Running into the woods, I shivered feeling my body change into the familiar shape of my wolf counterpart. Using all the force under my paws, I shot through the woods like a bullet.

A new start. A new beginning. A new life.

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